Don't Move
by 1tskillingm3
Summary: Roppi hates him. Hates the way he clearly trusts him despite having a million reasons not to. Hates the way he stares at him like he's worth something. The way he get's stupidly excited when they meet… Acting like any time spent with Roppi is precious. Roppi really hates him… he has to, because the alternative is to call the intense feeling in his chest by another name.


When the doorbell rings, Roppi knows _exactly_ who it is. Mostly because it only rang _once,_ and then the person waited politely for him to answer the door. Like a normal person was supposed to do. Not like some other people that he could mention that liked to keep ringing the bell over and over and over until he opened the door to scream at them. But, well, people who voluntarily associated with him were probably not normal (read: likely insane or not right in the head) anyway so he wasn't all that surprised.

"A package for you!" came the cheerful chirp as soon as he unlocked the six bolts and chains to get the door open. Roppi had to refrain from squinting, the person before him almost too bright after the dark of his apartment.

Tsukishima Heiwajima was the same as he always was… That is to say he was wearing too many layers of sweaters and carried a bulging bag of letters and packages over one shoulder. The scarf that always was wrapped around his neck no matter the weather was impeccably clean and well cared for, though it was so faded from the years it was hard to tell what it's original color had been(Izaya said it was his comfort item to help calm him down… not that Roppi had wanted to know). Golden hair that was a little too overgrown to be considered proper hung around a slightly round-ish face, pieces of it sticking straight up on the sides and back making it look like he'd just rolled out of bed or something… the fact that Roppi could see that meant that the idiot had apparently forgotten a hat _again_ and his cheeks were flushed from the cold air. Overly large round glasses with tinted lenses covered wide bambie eyes as Tsuki positively beamed at him.

Nobody should look that pleased to see him.

"You just going to stand there all day like a god-damned idiot or are you going to give me the package?" grumbled Roppi shifting in slight agitation.

"Oh! Oh, right!" said Tsuki, a little bit flustered as fumbled for the small brown package and pad, "Here you go!"

"Hn." Grunted Roppi as he quickly scribbled his signature and grabbed the package. Probably another assignment from Izaya.

"You- you've been getting a lot of mail lately." Commented Tsuki hesitantly, fiddling with the frayed edge of his scarf.

"Yeah, my piece of crap cousin has been working me to the bone lately with pointless shit. He's probably doing it on purpose, knowing that it'll piss me off." Growled Roppi examining the shape of the package. Tch, looked like a big box with probably only a USB inside. Why was he having him deliver this? Isn't this kind of stuff what the informant had Celty for? Roppi narrowed his red eyes.

"Oh, but master Izaya is always super nice!" said Tsuki earnestly, his eyes shining, "I am sure he wouldn't knowingly cause trouble for you!"

"Don't be naïve, he's just waiting to screw you over, that's what that little shit does." Groaned Roppi, for some reason it really pissed him off that him off whenever he thought about Tsuki working for his cousin. Probably just because he was so oblivious sometimes that it was painful to watch. That must be it. Not that he was worried for the idiot or anything, "And for fucks sake, don't call him 'master' Tsuki. He has enough of a god complex as it is."

"But mas- erm, Izaya asked me to call him that and he's my boss." Blinked Tsuki in confusion.  
"Tch, he would," Roppi gritted, he wasn't sure why that pissed him off so much, "he probably just get's off on someone with his darling 'Shizu-chan's face calling him that. Fucking disgusting. You don't have to call anyone 'master' even if you work for them. If Izaya has a problem with that, you should go tell him to fuck himself."

"… I don't think I could ever tell someone to go f-f-f… um, uh, go do that to themselves." Admitted Tsuki looking a little flustered by the vulgar language.

"Well maybe you should learn. You're too nice, people are just going to take advantage of you." Grumbled Roppi. He tried to be annoyed. He really did. But the way the blond innocently stumbled around saying the word 'fuck' made him almost want to smile. Roppi glowered. Never mind, he was definitely annoyed. He caught Tsuki staring at him with a slightly parted mouth and shinning eyes, making something flutter grossly in his chest and snap, "What?"

"Roppi is very kind, isn't he?" breathed Tsuki, his eyes practically sparkling under his glasses.

"I am not!" Roppi choked and promptly slammed the door in the other's face and relocking it.

Shit.

He fucked up.

That wasn't even a good segway to an exit, they were in the middle of a conversation. Nothing about that flowed. It was clearly an escape, and a ridiculously awkward one at that.

"Um-! Goodbye Roppi! Have a good rest of your day?" the blond called uncertainly from the other side of the door.

Yup. He definitely wanted the earth to swallow him about now.

Roppi slid to the floor and stared blankly into space. 'Maybe I should just stay like this for a few hours… or days… or forever.' Mused Roppi. But no, Izaya would become insufferable if he didn't go deal with whatever it was he sent him.

Izaya… Roppi scowled at the ceiling. Tsuki should not be working for the information broker. He was going to corrupt him. Or put him in danger. Or get him hurt _somehow_ because that's what Izaya did. He hurt the things he touched. Kinda similar to the way that Roppi tended to totally _destroy_ the things he touched.

Maybe that was why Tsuki pissed him off so much. He was like the symbol of all the things Roppi had lost over the years, all the things he couldn't have; innocence, trust, honesty, kindness… love. Roppi shook the thought off. He definitely didn't wish he had love, he'd seen the gross messed up things love made people do. His cousin had whole rants of insane delight dedicated to the subject. Roppi didn't want anything to do with that shit.

Roppi didn't know how long he lay there before his phone started ringing.

"What do you want?" Growled Roppi without looking at the caller ID. There was only one person who had this number after all.

"What a rude way to greet someone! You really could take a lesson from Tsuki-chan." Sighed Izaya dramatically, Roppi could almost see the squinty shit-eating grin he was probably wearing on the other end.

"Don't call him that." Snapped Roppi, "And you didn't answer my question."

"My, my, Roppi~ Someone's a little possessive." Trilled Izaya slyly.

"Why. Are. You. Calling?" Roppi growled out from gritted teeth because that statement didn't dignify a response.

"Would you believe me if I said I called because my Roppi senses were tingling?"

"No."

"Hmm… what if I said it was because I saw Tsuki-chan looking all tearful and distraught and I figured it was your fault?" asked Izaya cheerfully.

"…" Roppi contemplated how to ask if the blond was okay without sounding like he cared.

"So I was right?"

"Shut up. I will hang up." Roppi threatened closing his eyes and trying to calm his beating heart. This couldn't go on. He shouldn't want to protect someone this badly. Especially when he was the one most likely to hurt them in the first place.

"The fact that you haven't yet means you still want something from me right?" said Izaya, the self-satisfied grin audible in his tone.

"Either say what you want to say or I really will hang up." Threatened Roppi.

"OoOh! Scary Roppi has emerged!" laughed Izaya. Roppi waited with gritted teeth for him to finish, "I just wanted to tell you that I have one more delivery for Tsuki to you tonight, then you won't have to be bothered by him anymore."

"…Wait, what? Why?!" Roppi demanded, his chest constricting with foreboding.

"I had hoped to use Tsuki-chan, but it seems like he takes after the Heiwajima's after all… That is too say, he is annoyingly unpredictable. But no worries, no worries! Awakusu-kai is _very_ interested in obtaining him since they found out he shares Shizu-chan's strength, and there are others who are eager too! So Tsuki-chan won't be jobless for long! Well, he might be homeless for a bit since he's been living here with me, but-!"

Roppi hung up.

He stared at his phone blank faced for a moment, reeling in the confusing feeling rolling inside him. He felt like he was going to be sick. Tsuki was-! Izaya had-! People were going to-! Tsuki! Tsukitsukitsuki!

Before he realized what he was doing, Roppi found himself chucking his phone against the wall. Detached, he watched it shatter as he stood there in his house breathing hard despite not really doing anything. He stood there letting panicked thoughts bounce around his head. He stood there while the shadows lengthened and then engulfed the room as he made no move towards the lights. The sounds from the city changed from the steady hum of daytime activity to the sharp buzzing of nightlife.

Tsuki was come. Tsuki was coming _here._ And after he left… Roppi flipped open his blade and began to twirl it through his fingers as he at last moved to pace his dark apartment. He knew he was over reacting about this. He knew it, and yet-

The thought of Tsuki, sweet innocent Tsuki with his open smiles and gentle kindness, being forced by circumstance's to partake in shady and violent gang activities. He would cry, Roppi was sure of it. When the harsh realities of the city forced Shizuo to be monstrous he took it in his stride, the tall blond letting it become as much a part of his self as the other parts of his character. Tsuki though… that kind of life would destroy him. It wasn't a matter of if it would happen, Izaya would make sure it did. He'd push and pull information, and emotions, and circumstances till the blond broke and then he'd throw him away.

Roppi couldn't watch that.

The doorbell rang. Once.

"Roppi! I have another delivery for-oof!" exclaimed Tsuki as he was quickly dragged inside, the door slamming shut behind them as Roppi pulled the blond to the living room and shoved him down onto the couch before crowding in on him.

"Ropp-?" began Tsuki uncertainly before Roppi clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Don't." Hissed Roppi pressing the cold metal of his knife against his throat, "Don't move."

Tsuki held very still as he stared up at Roppi in confusion. Confusion, but not fear. And Roppi hates him for it. Hates the way he clearly trusts him despite having a million reasons not to. Hates the way he stares at him like he's worth something. The way he get's stupidly excited when they meet… Acting like any time spent with Roppi is precious.

He ends up moving his hand from his mouth to cover over those wide eyes instead. Izaya will wreck this person. Roppi knows that he will. Knows that Tsuki is exceptionally vulnerable to a person like him. Knows that Izaya will be exceptionally cruel because of his likeness to Shizuo. Roppi knows what to do. What he normally does. Just a quick slit with his knife and it be over. Roppi knows how to make sure they don't suffer. It's better than becoming Izaya's plaything. Or worse, one of those messed up gangs plaything.

Roppi's hand that holds the knife trembles. He can't make it move. It should be easy. It's normally easy. He doesn't care about humans. Doesn't care about anything, including himself.

"Roppi? What's wrong? Are you okay?" asked Tsuki worriedly. Still unafraid. Wanting to take care of Roppi(as usual)… _Caring_ for Roppi.

Roppi really hates him… he has to, because the alternative is to call the intense feeling in his chest by another name, and that is just not happening. Not ever. He won't let it.

Yet he knows that the hand holding the knife is not going to move. Wasn't really ever going to move. Because for some reason he can't hurt this person. Even though all he's ever been good for is hurting, he wants to try and protect this annoying(precious) person from the rest of the world. Even though he knows he's probably one of the greater dangers to Tsuki, he doesn't want to leave. Wants to stay close. Wants Tsuki to always look at him like he's not a monster. Like he means something to Tsuki too.

Roppi drops the knife onto the floor. And drops his hand from Tsuki's eyes as well. Fuck, this idiot _means_ something to him. For him. What though, he's not sure yet. Maybe his eternal damnation. Maybe his salvation. Either way he's kind of terrified and he's sure this can only end in tears but- but he _wants_. He wants so so much.

"Roppi?" asked Tsuki trying to squint at him through fingerprint covered glasses.

"Here, I'll get those for you." Mumbled Roppi, pulling the glasses free from the others face to quickly clean. Anything to not look at his face. Before replacing them though he freezes, reaching out and hesitantly tracing underneath large and innocent red eyes.

"I always thought you had brown eyes." Roppi swallowed. What kind of joke was this?

"Ah, no. My glasses kind of mute the color. I used to not like my eyes, but," and Tsuki smiled sweetly and sincerely as he lightly touched Roppi's cheek, "Now I've learned that red eyes can be quite beautiful."

He was touching him. Roppi normally stabbed people who tried to touch him. This kind of touch though… it was warm, nice. The kind Roppi could curl up in. The kind Roppi could become dangerously addicted to.

"I heard Izaya kicked you out." Blurted Roppi shoving the glasses back onto the other's face. Anything to make Tsuki stop saying things about his eyes. Their eyes. Them in general. Fuck. Roppi didn't know how to deal with this, so it was all forbidden territory for now.

"Oh, yeah." Blinked Tsuki looking surprised at the sudden subject change, "It was kinda out of the blue, I am not sure what I did wrong. I think I said something wrong, but I don't know exactly what. My bag is outside, I was going to call up a friend after I made my delivery to ask if I could crash on their floor till I find a new place to li-"

"Stay here." Roppi blurted. Then bit his tongue. That was a terrible idea, why did he suggest that? But he couldn't make himself take it back either now that it was out there, nor could he deny how much he wanted it.

"Pardon?" said Tsuki blinking. Roppi took a deep breath, 'it's just so you can better protect him from Izaya and the others' he tried to tell himself. It made him feel slightly better, pretending that he didn't have a second agenda (not that he even knew what his other agenda might even be at this point, just that his feelings around the blond were more complex than he'd originally thought and that he hated them and was determined to stay in denial as long as possible)

"I… You can stay here. For however long" _forever_ his heart begged(he told it to shut up), "I have an extra room with a bed from a time Psyche once stayed here, but he's been banded from the house so no one's using it. I mean, if you want to. I don't care, just don't make a mess. It's whatever you-"

"Yes!" exclaimed Tsuki looking positively stary eyed and blushing, "If that's okay, I- I would love to stay with you!"

"R-Really?" swallowed Roppi, how had he ever thought he was capable of harming this person? "Well- well then, let's grab your stuff then."

Tsuki nodded so eagerly his glasses nearly slipped down his nose. Cute. Roppi felt like slapping himself. Instead the two of them moved Tsuki's sparse belongings into Psyche's old room(Roppi had to fight the urge to spoil Tsuki and buy him all sorts of things when he saw how little he owned).

"There's… a _lot_ of pink in here." Observed Tsuki hesitantly.

"Yeah," agreed Roppi looking at the stuff his brother had left in distaste, "We'll burn it or something later."

"We can't burn it! That'd be such a waste!" exclaimed Tsuki.

"Sure we can." Scoffed Roppi.

"I'll use it! I don't mind pink! Or we can return it to your brother!" insisted Tsuki.

"You are never going near my brother," said Roppi already cringing at the mental image of Psyche in the same room as Tsuki, "He'd eat you alive."

"Oh? Uh, I am sure he's not _that_ bad." Said Tsuki uncertainly.

"He is that bad. He's a pest." Said Roppi flatly.

"Well-"

"No. Just… trust me on this one Tsuki." Said Roppi running his fingers tiredly through his short dark hair.

"Okay, I trust you Roppi." Smiled Tsuki so gently that Roppi had to look away.

"You… you can always leave if you ever want to, or if you find a better place. I'll give you the keys and all that shit. But, uh, fuck, what I mean to say is; this can be your home as long as you want it to be." Said Roppi awkwardly, feeling heat creep up his cheeks.

"Home with Roppi… that sounds nice." Flushed Tsuki looking absurdly pleased by the sound of that. Roppi's heart summersaulted.

He might hate him after all…

…Because he was so so fucked when it came to this person.

 _Note:_

 _So boy's and girls and others, let me remind you that Roppi is not a great example of someone who engages in relationships in a healthy way(I hope that's obvious, but just in case). But he'll get there. They'll both get there. Eventually. And it'll be great._

 _*If any one is interested, Tsuki get's a new job at a flower shop. Roppi learns to trust Tsuki to be able to protect himself from most things(he is super strong despite how he looks) and only gets really overprotective when it comes to interactions with Izaya or his brother. Tsuki still gets hopelessly lost all the times, but Roppi always comes to find him._


End file.
